My dealings with love...

a look back...

Published on June 20, 2005 By ----- In Life

Well, looking back, way back to...when i was 4 years old i knew a girl named sophie...she had the brightest, almost white, hair i had ever seen (and still to this day i have yet too see hair that bright) she and i were a match, we were in a way more like "double-trouble"...we would deffinantly raise hell...i lost contact with here when her mom, who taught my elder sister, got a job offer elsewhere.....kindergarten, i knew a girl who's parents were close friends, i was pretty much attracted to her smile...(thats my big thing other than honesty..)her family ended up moving and we next saw each other at a rivalry game between my highschool and hers...during my freshman year in HS.....at the age of 9, i had another crush...a girl in my class, she was very pretty and we both were friends...i really don't think i realised i had a crush...as i was too young...she too moved away and yet again i never was able to tell her...my next one was in middle school, she was a fairly tall (5'9) blond hair, and blue eyes...she smart and funny, and very athletic, she was tops at our M.S. in track, and X-country...we only saw each other at school as she lived out of town...almost 50 miles, she lived on a farm....so it wasn't ideal to go on dates...i danced with her at a few school dances, then.....she was killed by a drunk driver on her way home during my junior year of HS...I was devestated....(i went to a different HS but still kept in contact, but had gone on from having any feelings,we were friends) after that i had a few crushes...none as intense as the previous...then...my freshman year....I met a girl who was, IMO, an angel....she was slightly smaller than me at that time(Me=5'10 ! time), she was part italian-spanish-american...so her skin tone was sort of an amber...she had brown hair and eyes and a smile that made me feel as i was melting away...perfect....IMO....I struggled (i am a very shy person, and was even more so then as i was over weight by almost 130 lbs...[btw, i lost 150 lbs and grew a 1 1/2 ft. within a 1.5 years] this caused my to not be very social) soooo......I had a hard time to tell her how i felt...I tried and tried, but i was so awed by her beauty that i would stutter in front of her and forget everything i was supposed to say....)

Wonderfull huh?....welll i finally told her....my senior year, at my graduation all night party, the last day i would have anythig to do with HS...( DUHH!!!) well, lets just say i wasted a lot of time, as the "brush off" was....well, not so nice, and she had said i was a nice guy, so i was hoping that wasn't the reason why...(in that i could have been a "freak".... :/ ) sooo...for days afterwards i was depressed...deeply depressed..., i had loved her.....and had put evrything on the line....but....i was foolish, and my sight of her was clouded, as i didn't see her for who she was really....it took me awhile to recover... but two years later....i met Jasmine,and now, we are planned on getting married the 25th of this month...(will be gone a week after for honeymoon...) so i guess i've learned my lesson...but i've definantly realised one thing, in the game of love, you've gotta protect your "heart" in the chance that you are rejected.....so,what do you guys think?

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