"If some one is falsely assumed/accused to be a narcisst, dram 'queen' or anything else for that matter, should they defend themselves, should the continually defend their integrity? Or should they fold, and recede into the dark trenches made by the continuous 'bluggining' like comments by those who accused,etc... How would you think of that person..would you judge quickley...or would you approach it reasonably..."

Neither. Address it, with the understanding that you aren't defending your integrity if you sacrifice your integrity to do it. I like to argue, or I wouldn't be here. I don't even mind "personal" stuff here and there. If someone has a beef with you and get's all "your momma" about it, try to keep on the beef itself. If you make a big deal about them calling you on it, or the way they called you on it, you just leave their original point there for everyone to accept unhindered.

If you find that there is truth to what they are saying, address it. Honestly, posting a title and a link isn't really that respectful to the people you bump off the list. It doesn't do you any justice, and after a while people will just stop looking. When they do it will be on the merits of the title, not what you have to offer to the subject.

I think you would have gotten the point if you had been more receptive to the complaint, instead of the acidic tone it was handed down in. That's the Internet, though, and, frankly, that's Little Whip. You take people around here warts and all because you know they have a lot more to offer than warts. What you did was focus on the wart and didn't hear the valid complaint.

To me, if you had said "You're right, I could do better than just posting a link, and thanks for being a bitch about it.", I think it would have diffused it a lot more than trying to defend yourself for just posting links. Sure, there's no rules, and you can post links if you want, but if you hang out you'll find that even when people pass on what they find interesting they try to spin it so that people understand why they find it interesting.

If you stay on you'll see people who do a lot of copy/paste and linking, and you'll see they often get a ton of hits just for picking the right subject. No, hits aren't that important, but when someone who didn't bother to do anything but make an 'A' tag gets as much attention and buries the article you spent an hour writing, you'll understand.

You've had a bad start, but by now you should start feeling when a situation is futile. Eventually you have to say, "You know what? Nothing I say is going to make any difference because you aren't interested in (fixing) (discussing) this anyway." It happens a lot. People fire off stuff they want to say and they really don't have any intention of coming to terms or finding a deeper truth. Make your point and go. Their mind is theirs, and in the end it is their blog.

I think you would have gotten the point if you had been more receptive to the complaint, instead of the acidic tone it was handed down in. That's the Internet, though, and, frankly, that's Little Whip. You take people around here warts and all because you know they have a lot more to offer than warts. What you did was focus on the wart and didn't hear the valid complaint.

--I did, i said I would do what people suggested...and yet she continued..it gets flipping annoying...no, not annoying, more than that, at one point (unfortunatley, cause i am pretty big pacifist) i wanted to reach through the computer and slap some sense in her... along with the comment in dong what was sugessted, i aske that she apologize , she didn't know me...and she,IMO is ignorant of me, and who i am...just because i have a condition that makes some question me..., does not mean they can't get past that and get to know me better...i'm a nice guy...but at times like that...i get so angery because thats how i have been treated most of my life...different...I think i'm just going to adopt a don't give a fuck policy...if they disagree...DGAF...its my blog...they can deal with it...arghh...i don't know...

Ur, come on, it was well into a raging cursefest that you conceded the point. From what I recall it was a lot of "I'll do whatever the blankety blank I want", at least until you got bored with it.

All I'm saying is you get what you pay for, it takes two to tango, etc. If someone calls you a few dozen choice names and you appear reasonable enough to deal with the gripe, it isn't going to be you that looks over-the-top. What you did was match her tone and then turn up the volume two or three notches. That's not something you can easily take back.

do what you like, but it seemed like you really wanted to know how best to handle it. When someone comes raving up to you on the street, you'd know better than to rave twice as loud back. You'd look at them like they were a nut and try to at least portray yourself as the reasonable side of the conflict. Just do the same here when at all possible and you won't have many problems.

Everyone loses their temper. I do off and on. You just don't want to define yourself by this silliness.

I had conceded the point from the beggining...but i never voiced it...i was just so angery that some one would call me that...it just f****** wrong...but, yep, its over...hopefully...well thank you for your opinons...

I agree with Baker on this...
Bottom line though is that it's over... time to drop it and move on; But here... not someplace else!

thanks for your thoughts on this...PFFFT!!! letting out some steam...

think you would have gotten the point if you had been more receptive to the complaint, instead of the acidic tone it was handed down in. That's the Internet, though, and, frankly, that's Little Whip. You take people around here warts and all because you know they have a lot more to offer than warts. What you did was focus on the wart and didn't hear the valid complaint.

BakerStreet: for sure you got an insightful here! so well put, the whole post was awesome!

Your blog is a good place to blow off steam.  So rant away!

A suggestion.  if you use IE, go to www.download.com and download iespellsetup211325.exe  It saves my butt on spelling.

In the first place, "integrity" is defined as: 1) Steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code. 2) The state of being unimpaired; soundness. 3) The quality or condition of being whole or undivided; completeness. Since you have confessed (only after being caught red-handed, btw) to being a "pathological liar" Lucas, you have no integrity to defend. You have neither "steadfastly adhered to a strict moral code", (unless your moral code includes lying) nor are you "unimpaired or sound" of mind--as you claim you feel compelled to lie and cannot help yourself. In addition, I do not see how you can consider yourself "whole or complete" since you cannot even keep track of your own lies, nor are you a particularly good liar. You should worry about establishing some credibility before you worry about defending it. Since you also seem to have some problems with the meaning of the words you utter, lets take a look at the word "crediblity" itself, shall we? 1) The quality, capability, or power to elicit belief. 2) A capacity for belief. How can anyone in their right mind be expected to believe a single thing that self-professed patholigical liar has to say? You are defending a fallacy, a fantasy, something you do not have--ie: "credibility."

--My Integrity has merely "diminished"...a steadfast moral code is defined by each person,...I am as sound of mind as one who suffers from pathological lying can be...Your ignorance concerning this subject precedes you...I have yet to bl you in hope that you can understand how the condition is, how it is difficult to deal with, and that you could, perhaps, understand...but i don't know... see ya...

You cannot 'diminish' that which you do not have in the first place. You are patently unable to be truthful, and that leaves your integrity counter at ZERO

--Patently?...i have gotten over the last conflict i had with you, i just want to still remain (at least) acquaintences, but it doesn't seem so...

Ok, you've managed to make a bit of an enemy with LW. Your best bet right now is to just let it drop 100%. Don't respond to anything she says, don't give her any reason or opportunity to jump in. I can tell you that no matter what you try to do in your own defense (right or wrong) LW will rip you a new one. The best strategy is to just go about your blogging, let her go about hers and just pretend she doesn't exist.

Otherwise you're just going to get shredded.

Patently In a patent manner; openly, plainly, or clearly: a patently false statement. adv : unmistakably (`plain' is often used informally for `plainly'); "the answer is obviously wrong"; "she was in bed and evidently in great pain"; "he was manifestly too important to leave off the guest list"; "it is all patently nonsense"; "she has apparently been living here for some time"; "I thought he owned the property, but apparently not"; "You are plainly wrong"; "he is plain stubborn" (syn: obviously, evidently, manifestly, apparently, plainly) I've also done a bit of research on this malady you claim to have, it doesn't exist other than as a symptom of a deeper psychiatric problem, like narcissism. It is not a medically recognized mental disorder in and of itself. I suggest you seek help, and do it now, before you ruin your entire life. (IF, of course, your claim is true at all.)

--Thanks for the definition, never used the word...i am seeking psychiatric help, my guess is that it could be from my "relationship" first step dad, who was pretty abusive...i've already fucked up a majority of my life, thankfully some of those that were affected have remained my friends,etc...but, as a wise man once told me.."trust is easy to destroy, very hard to rebuild. be patient" And i will leave it alone...ciao!

How can you have had a friend for 22 years when you're only 18?

Reply By: dharmagrlPosted: Friday, November 18, 2005How can you have had a friend for 22 years when you're only 18?

Well, I do have friends that i've known a long while... 17-ish years think.... so... i just...'extended' the time here....

~smiles~He was still in liar-mode as he defended his integrity here, lol.

I believe it was about a week later "hell broke loose"...

But i thought it was "credibility"?


--Lucas