How do you handle telemarketers?

Published on April 24, 2006 By ----- In Humor

"Hello sir, have I got a deal for you!"

No thank...

How many get calls from telemarketers, sometimes at ungodly hours...? Well...I've handled them in the following manners:

"No thank you." ~Followed by hanging up.

"Ya know what, i am really interested, but could you give me a second. I have dinner on." ~Followed by leaving the phone and "forgetting" about it.

"Me no speak english" ~

It works...

"No-No. I have a great deal for you!" ~ I go on babbling about random "deals".

I hang up, as soon as i hear anything 'telemarketer-ish".

"Sure, I'd love to hear about the offer, but how about I call you back."

"No (sir or m'am) I don't need ______" ~Inserting a random, off the wall thing.

"So, you make how much doing telemarketing?"

"How you doin?" ~Yeah, from 'friends', but hey...it got drilled into my brain with my sister loving the show, and-it works.

These are the few i could think of at the moment. So, how do you handle telmarketers?

~Lucas

Comments (Page 1)

Voyager9

on Apr 24, 2006

There are two kinds of telemarketers. The ones trying to sell you something (local paper, magazines..etc), and the ones trying to collect money for .
For the ones selling papers and magazines I usually break down sobbing and claim "I never learned to read!", though that backfired once as the guy preceeded to tell me about the wonderful full-color coupons.
I've also had someone jump on the line at the same time I answer the phone and we proceed to have a conversation.

Usually I don't answer "Out of area" calls

Locamama

on Apr 24, 2006

Caller ID is a wonderful thing. I only talk to people I want to talk to. I pay the phone bill not them. Sometimes I just turn the ringer off for the whole day. It's bliss.

dharmagrl

on Apr 24, 2006

I answer the phone, and when they tell me which company they're from I cut them off and tell them I'm not interested and would they please remove me from their calling list. Then I hang up.

If they call back (which sometimes happens) I remind them that their company can be fined for calling me after I asked them not to and again, I hang up.

There's usually not a third call. If there is, I tell them that any company that calls me three times after I requested them to stop must be completely unorganized and I wouldn't want anything to do with them anyway.

There hasn't been a fourth call. Yet.

just john

on Apr 24, 2006

I have a service from the phone company called Privacy Director. When an out of area caller calles in, my caller ID alerts me to the fact that the privacy director has picked up the phone. The service forces the caller to record their name and info so that I can hear it before I decide to answer the call (like a collect call). I am then given the option to answer the call, hang up or mark as a telemarketer. After they have been marked the phone comapany blocks their call for me.

I have never had a problem with the same telemarketer calling back from a different number.

Dr Guy

on Apr 24, 2006

I tell them I am not at home! If they ask if there is a Mrs. Guy, I tell them nope! (She kept her maiden name). Most of the time, I dont have to worry about it past there.

Gideon MacLeish

on Apr 24, 2006

Since they usually call back, I like to mess with them to prevent it. Since they have a time limit to their calls (especially those resulting in no sales), I will string them on as long as I can, often ending the call by going to get a pen, never to return.

It's more effective, and fun, than a "no call" list, I'll tell you that.

Demosthenes Locke

on Apr 24, 2006

I like to cut them off with a "Cut the foreplay salesman, what are you selling?" I've only gotten to use it twice, but it gives me a good chuckle each time, and throws people off of their script. Being a salesman, you might think I'd be nicer, like the way people who work in tip jobs are generally good tippers. Maybe I just feel like telemarketers give me a bad name, so it's like pulling the legs off of insects to torture them.

lifehappens

on Apr 24, 2006

I've been very mean in the past, but my currently my favorites are,
1) asking for a very detailed explaination, not paying attention (I'm busy doing other stuff after all) and then asking them to start over because I was distracted. Ususally they hang up after the 3rd or 4th time you ask them to start over.
2) asking them to hold on and them making barfing sounds into the toilet (phone held close for maximum effect)
3) giving the phone to a kid and telling them it's Santa Clause and they better tell him everything they want for Christmas.
The local paper calls us to subscribe and my husband always gets angry and yells, "I told you that I'm not givign any more interviews!" and hangs up.

Gideon MacLeish

on Apr 24, 2006

The local paper calls us to subscribe and my husband always gets angry and yells, "I told you that I'm not givign any more interviews!" and hangs up.

I would try that except it might really, really hurt my campaign...lol!

Dick Gozinya

on Apr 24, 2006

Why is it so hard to either:

Use caller ID, or
Use an answering machine, or
Just say "No thanks" and hang up?

The reason so many customer service calls are now answered in India or the Phillipines (putting Americans out of work) is because nobody wants to DO this type of work anymore. Nowadays I even GET calls from out of the country, trying to sell everything from newspapers to home refinancing.

, maybe we can start sending the jobs to Mexico instead of India, they might stay home and do the work that "no Americans will do" instead of coming here illegally.

Gideon MacLeish

on Apr 24, 2006

Why is it so hard to either:

Use caller ID, or
Use an answering machine, or
Just say "No thanks" and hang up?

Because most of them block caller ID, I don't want to be held hostage to an answering machine, and they don't accept "no thanks" as an answer if they have a "live one on the line". But most importantly, I torment them because it is fun.

SanChonino

on Apr 24, 2006

The world of Telemarketing is a thankless job, but I hear it does pay really well

I have a friend that used to work for Discover Card as a telemarketer, but rather than selling, he would have to call and let them know about outstanding charges, repos, etc.
His own words to describe it: "Yes, I knew that I had sold my soul for the mess of pottage. But when that pottage is eleven bucks an hour and you're in high school, forget about your soul!"

-----

on Apr 24, 2006

Wow...guess for my next article i'd better put "telemarketers" in the title.

Anywho...

Voyager9

Oops.

Caller ID is a wonderful thing.

True, though curiosity kills the cat. Also, my mum has a friend that is currently living in idaho - so at times it has been him. Course...I haven't remembered his phone number.

dharmagrl

Try telling that to the dude from American Express.

Geesh! I think it was the 5th time before he quit ,nothing so far.

just john

Yeah...we used to have that.

Reply By: Dr. Guy

That is pretty fun/funny...

Demosthenes Locke

Ouch.

Reply By: Gideon MacLeish

giving the phone to a kid and telling them it's Santa Clause and they better tell him everything they want for Christmas

Ooh, thats cruel. (Not the kids...)

Dick Gozinya

What Gid said.

The reason so many customer service calls are now answered in India or the Phillipines (putting Americans out of work) is because nobody wants to DO this type of work anymore. Nowadays I even GET calls from out of the country, trying to sell everything from newspapers to home refinancing

I've had calls from India. Boy...did those people speak fast.

(That or I was 'really' tired...)

The world of Telemarketing is a thankless job

True enough...and, thats a job i've looked into when i head off to the a university...

Take care y'all ~Lucas

Dr Guy

on Apr 24, 2006

I dont have any more to add, but I am not going to let you kill your own thread.

(just in case)

-----

on Apr 24, 2006

I dont have any more to add, but I am not going to let you kill your own thread. (just in case)

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